August had barely hit and already my email and texts were filling up. Companies that I’ve either thought remotely about buying something, signed up for a one time discount or have any kind of a very loose connection to are hitting me up with “birthday greetings.” Oh, and their idea of a “gift.”
Now I don’t know about you but when I give a birthday gift, I think about the person, go find something I think they’ll want or need, purchase it, put it in a gift bag with a card and present to them on or right about on their actual birthday. And years ago, before COVID, I would spend the day of my actual birthday running around trying to collect all the “free” gifts that I could. A free doughnut, a free hamburger, a free coffee – it was a bit of a fattening free birthday of sorts.
But when the texts and emails started coming, there was a hint of excitement of “oh, what cool thing will I get?” That excitement quickly dissipated as I read through the “birthday messages.” Free was not the adjective of the day. And gift was a usely used verb that didn’t really ring true.
I got an offer to get a free doughnut, provided that I purchase something in the $10 dollar range. Then there is the chicken place that “gave” me 250 points in the app. I looked it up and I could get one piece of chicken or French fries but not both. A gas company gave me five cents off a gallon of gas. An outdoor clothing company offered me $25 off my order. A hardware company offered me 24-month financing if I bought something over $300. Another clothing company “gave” me $5 in their store cash so I hit their site and clicked on the $5 and under items. I found a mini Nerf water gun for $3.24 and went straight to check out and learned I owed them $8.95. That’s still in my shopping cart.
So nothing was really a gift. But perhaps I should use this strategy on those folks I choose to honor on their birthday. Perhaps something like, Hey, it’s your birthday, let’s go to Peasoup’s and you order whatever you want and I’ll give you $5 toward it. I’m thinking that’s not going to be a very big hit and I won’t get invited back to any more birthday celebrations.
So, I’ll just wait till August 20th and then Google “free birthday things” and see if free really is free anymore.
If not, I reckon I’ll just go and ask how old you have to be for the senior discount and count that as a birthday win on my 62nd trip around the sun.
