Summertime. In the Delta. Yes, heat and humidity partner up to make headlines. Every. Single. Year. And yes, folks complain. Been there done that. And then folks start talking about winter and how they like it more and would rather have minus four degrees than 100 plus.
No. You. Wouldn’t. Been there, done that, too, and have the parka, funky winter hats and gloves and snow boots to prove it. Having been through both, I’ll take the heat. To prove my point, I made a trip home five years ago from my Michigan zip code. A year where we had snow and a deep freeze in May. May. Not March or April but May. You know the month school is getting out and pools are opening. There’s a reason yankee folks retire south. Because of minus four degree weeks. There’s only so much hot chocolate you can drink. There’s only so much snow you can shovel. There’s only so much ice to slip on and create moves that James Brown would envy and your chiropractor grins and upgrades his summer plans over.
Driving my 2001 GMC Yukon XL and hitting the Delta in late June the regional temps were climbing to three digits. The humidity had four. My A/C was working fine. Then it wasn’t. I reckon God knew I needed a good thawing out. I thawed out and then some. But I smiled with sweat pouring off of me as I remembered the brutal, cold winter and spring that my body was still having words with me about. I drove around with the windows down and yes, 100 degrees plus heat and 1,000 percent humidity and driving somewhere north of the speed limit feels just like the Santa Ana winds in Southern California. Yes, I’ve experienced those as well. Just hold a hair dryer up to your face for 24 hours and you’ll get a good idea of what those are like. But back to that minus four degrees some of y’all have said you’d trade this annual diablo summer for.
When you first experience frozen weather, you think, “hey, no biggie.” Then you slide off the road faster than you can say anything and no matter your driving skills, the road just laughs and puts you where it wants. Ever hydroplaned?
Yes, I have and losing control on ice is hydroplaning on steroids.
Four-wheel-drive helps but don’t think it’s the greatest thing known to man. It’s not. Four wheels sliding off the road happens as well. You just slow it down and leave the house a lot sooner than you wanted or you buy a lot of new underwear because, well, stuff happens. Snowplows are cool to watch but hey, follow at your own peril.
That ice and snow flies off their blade at an incredible rate and piles up into a virtual frozen steel wall. Don’t see a pile in a neighborhood and think, “Hey, wouldn’t it be fun to plow right through that in my truck?” A pile of frozen snow and ice makes quite a dent and tests your seatbelt instantly, I might add.
God bless the heat and humidity as it grows corn as high as an elephant’s eye and beans and rice to fill bellies across the world. And it blooms out cotton for the whole world. I’ve cursed the heat while working in it but no more after experiencing what real cold actually is.
The summer heat and humidity aren’t for the faint of heart or for those athletes who aren’t dedicated. It melts you into a man and one formidable athlete or makes you yearn for a job with a cubicle and full on A/C.
The heat and humidity bless and torment at the same time.
I’ll take both and smile and you can have the minus four, bless your heart.
