YOU ASKED: My husband’s mother still introduces him to women and even tries to get my husband and these women out on solo outings together. Is it my place to confront her about this?
WE ANSWERED:
First, let me say this plainly: what your mother-in-law is doing is completely inappropriate and deeply disrespectful; not just to you as her son’s wife, but to your marriage.
Now, to your question: Is it your place to confront her?
Yes, but how and when you do it matters just as much as you do it.
Ideally, your husband should be the one to establish clear boundaries with his mother. This is his family of origin, and he is the one who needs to make it unequivocally clear that he is married, committed, and not open to entertaining other women, whether it's for casual outings or polite introductions. That is his responsibility as your partner.
However, if he hasn’t addressed it or if he has and she continues, you absolutely have the right to speak up. Not with anger or drama, but with calm, clear, assertive honesty.
If she denies it, minimizes it, or blames you for being jealous or insecure, don’t get pulled into emotional manipulation. Stay rooted in the facts and your right to be respected as his wife.
Also, take a moment to check in with your husband. If he’s not shutting this down, or worse, going along with it, then the real issue may not be just his mother. A marriage can withstand meddling relatives, but not when one partner allows the interference to thrive.
In a healthy relationship, loyalty is non-negotiable, and boundaries are a form of love, not hostility. You deserve both.
If anyone would like to chime in on this discussion or ask any questions about domestic violence, abuse, or healthy relationships, email us at NoMoreDVorAbuse@ourhousevoices.com
NEXT WEEK: My boyfriend for a little over a year agrees I love him more than he loves me. He does treat me so nicely and reassures me that he does love me and wouldn’t want anyone else. What can I do to make things better? Do I need to distance myself and try to love him less? Am I overthinking and is this not that big of an issue? I feel clingy and I don’t want him to leave. Help...I need your advice.
